Thank God It’s Friday (the 13th)!

 

I was sixteen when Friday the 13^th came out, and I saw it in a local single-screen movie theater that showed one movie at a time for a week-long engagement. The screen was minuscule compared to today’s IMAX and ScreenX, and I doubt the theater itself could fit more than 100 people (and probably fit fewer). No luxury loungers, either. Just stiff seats with minimal padding upholstered in coarse fabric. And it had the legendary movie theater sticky floor (from spilled soda – at least, that’s what we told ourselves).

 

It was wonderful.

 

Slasher films were relatively new in America, especially to mainstream movie audiences. Video cassette rental was a couple of years in the future, and while cable TV existed, my small town didn’t have it. So if a slasher flick didn’t come to a theater near you, you didn’t get to see it. I’d always been a monster kid, fascinated by Horror movies, comics, toys, and – when I got older – novels. But the closest I got to experiencing the grindhouse rawness of slasher films was reading Fangoria magazine, which treated slasher films and the SFX masters who made their gory deaths possible with the highest reverence. But that wasn’t the same as seeing the films. I’d watched Halloween a couple of years earlier, and while it’s arguably the movie that started the slasher genre in America (Italy’s Giallo films had been spilling blood on movie screens since the 1960s, and of course there was Black Christmas), Halloween was as much, if not more, of a suspense film. Friday the 13^th was almost the first true slasher. It certainly had gory kills, along with a twisted version of justice for the killer’s motivation, but it was a murder mystery, too. It wasn’t until Friday the 13^th Part II that we got the true slasher paradigm – an unstoppable killer who wears a mask that makes them appear to be a monster, inventively slaying teens who act immorally. The modern equivalent of kids’ mothers telling them that the boogeyman will get them if they don’t behave. And the unmasking of the killer at the end of a slasher film has echoes of Scooby-Doo as well. “I’d have killed everyone if it wasn’t for you meddling kids!”(Scream is the perfect “Scooby-Doo Slasher.”) I’ve written before about how characters like Michael and Jason are reinterpretations of the Grim Reaper archetype (and they’ve got more than a bit of the Frankenstein Monster in them…how they move, the way they kill without speaking, how they keep returning from seeming death...) In the Friday the 13^th films, all of these elements came together in a kind of unholy alchemy to create a new archetype – or at least one that seemed new – which is what gave the archetype its power. Horror fans loved Jason Voorhees, but it wasn’t until Part VI (when he was resurrected like a literal Frankenstein Monster) that he became a worldwide icon and was elevated to the pantheon of legendary monsters.

 

I saw most of the F13 movies in the theater as they came out and had fun with them all. My favorite experience was seeing Jason X because the woman at the ticket counter refused to sell my brother and me tickets because the movie was, in her words, “so bad.” We finally convinced her to let us in, but she said that if we hated the movie after fifteen minutes, she’d give us free tickets to any other movie showing in the theater.

 

I also loved Friday the 13^th: The Series, even if it had nothing to do with the films. I always wondered if, in that world, Jason’s hockey mask was one of Lewis Vendredi’s cursed objects. Or maybe his machete…

 

I read Simon Hawke’s novelizations of the first six films, and I was thrilled when Black Flame started publishing new novels featuring Jason, Jason X, Freddy, and Final Destination. I wrote a Freddy novel titled Protégé, and I was in the process of writing a Final Destination novel titled Nightmare City (my editor was a big fan of zombie movies), but the line folded, and the book was never completed. I’d hoped to write a Jason or Jason X book as well, but that never happened.

 

But then Perrin Drumm and Jon Dieringer at A24 Publishing asked if I’d be interested in writing the novelization of the forthcoming Crystal Lake TV series. I’d written novelizations of Ti West’s X-Trilogy for A24, and they liked my work well enough to ask me back. I said yes, of course, and once the NDA and contract were signed, I had Zoom meetings with the editors/publishers and series showrunner Brad Caleb Kane. Brad – as he says in the introduction to the book – is a lifelong fan of novelizations, and he was thrilled and excited about the novel. He made sure I had access to the latest scripts and the most recent episodes as they were finished. He was also happy to talk about the story and characters with me and answer whatever questions I had.

 

I loved the story Brad and the series writers told with Crystal Lake. It was a loving homage to F13 while being its own thing. It added more backstory, deeper characterization, and psychological complexity, while still splashing gallons of blood all over the screen.

 

But as I wrote the book, I soon realized that this novelization was unlike any of the previous nine I’d done. A basic movie script for a ninety-minute film results in about 40,000 words of prose when fleshed out. Novel publishers want at least 80,000 words, meaning the novelization writer has to invent a lot of material. (Ti West preferred I didn’t add anything to his scripts – which is his right as the creator of the trilogy – which is why those books are short.) But Crystal Lake was eight episodes in length, and each episode was approximately 45 minutes or more long. Instead of novelizing a 90- to 120-minute movie, I had to novelize around six-and-a-half hours of story. That meant the novel would end up being 160,000 words long, and that’s if I didn’t add any material of my own! So I went through all the scripts to determine what I could condense and what I could omit, but when I saw the episodes, I realized how important everything was to the overall story. I couldn’t simply cut events or characters, certainly not as many as I would need to get the book down to a manageable size for A24 to publish (a maximum of 120,000 words).

 

I wracked my brain trying to figure out how to complete what seemed an impossible task. Then it came to me – I would act as if I was adapting a book for the screen. The Crystal Lake series was the “book,” and my novel would be the “adaptation” of it. Screen adaptations have to condense and cut a lot of material from a novel, and I hoped that mindset would serve me well as I wrote my book. (It did!) I used my long experience as a novelist to find simpler ways to include information from some scenes without completely dramatizing them, and I found ways to add bits and pieces of my own throughout to expand on some important story elements. Brad had some ideas for areas of the story that could be expanded, and my one regret writing the book was that we didn’t have room to include them all. I hope there’s a second season of Crystal Lake so he’ll get to explore those story elements.

 

The final draft was around 108,000 words.

 

People ask me if it’s hard writing a novelization and keeping plot details secret until the movie – or in this case, series – is released. Not really. The NDAs I sign mean I could get in legal trouble for sharing any plot details, but even if I didn’t sign an NDA, I wouldn’t want to spoil anything for people. They get to have the one thing I give up by writing a novelization – the ability to see the movie or series for the first time without knowing what’s going to happen. It is, however, a lot of fun to watch people on the internet theorize about what’s going to be in the movie/series. They are often spectacularly wrong.

 

There were some early mentions of the book online that most people didn’t seem to notice. The book was announced last February in a Publisher’s Weekly article on novelizations. (My friend, author Rena Mason, saw it, though!) And B&N jumped the gun and had the book listed for preorder for a month before A24 found out and asked them to take down the listing.

 

For various reasons, A24 and Jason Universe didn’t want to announce the novel before the series came out. This was fine with me. That way, I wouldn’t have people emailing me asking me to reveal plot details to them. (It took only twenty minutes after the novel was officially announced before I received the first message asking me to divulge plot secrets.)

 

Writing tie-ins is fun, and it’s wild to become a small part of the legacy of famous characters like Freddy, Michael, the Xenomorph, Art the Clown, and of course Jason and Pamela Voorhees. I think of novelizations as collaborations with people I never meet, but I got to talk to Brad several times (he’s a lovely person). I didn’t get to talk to the other series writers, but I had their words, and since I got to watch the episodes, I was able to use the actors’ performances and the directors’ visions to inform my writing. Linda Cardellini brought to life an incredibly complex character who I think will become the definitive Pamela Voorhees from now on. Her performance is magnificent.

 

In a sense, everyone who worked on the series influenced Crystal Lake: The Novel in some way, and I’m grateful to them all. Here’s a link to the series’ IMDB entry so you can check out everyone who helped make Crystal Lake what it is: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt23148340/

 

Jessica Lott edited the book, and it’s much improved thanks to her efforts. I’ve been traditionally publishing fiction and nonfiction for forty years, and she’s one of the best editors I’ve worked with.

 

And I have to mention Abigail Reno, who narrated the audiobook. She did a fantastic job!

 

https://www.abigailreno.com/

 

If you read the book, I hope you find it to be an enjoyable companion to the series, as well as a satisfying reading experience in its own right…and keep your fingers crossed for Season 2!

 

DEPARTMENT OF SHAMELESS SELF-PROMOTION

 

Here are the current ordering links for The Crystal Lake: The Novel. When more become available, I’ll update the list.

 

A24

 

Print: https://shop.a24films.com/products/crystal-lake-the-novel-by-tim-waggoner

 

Amazon

 

Audio: https://tinyurl.com/5n7fhcsh

 

Barnes and Noble

 

Print: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/crystal-lake-tim-waggoner/1150436578?ean=9781960078490

 

SCHEDULED APPEARANCES

·       Writer’s Digest Horror Writing Virtual Conference, Full Session: Building a Better Monster. Saturday, Oct. 17.

·       AuthorCon VII. March 5-7. Williamsburg, Virginia.

·       StokerCon. June 10-13. Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

·       Shivercon. July 23-24. Muncie, Indiana.

WHERE TO FIND ME ONLINE

·       Want to follow me on social media? Here’s where you can find me:

·       Website: www.timwaggoner.com

·       Newsletter Sign-Up: https://timwaggoner.com/contact.htm

·       Amazon Page: https://www.amazon.com/stores/Tim-Waggoner/author/B001JP0XFM?ref=ap_rdr&store_ref=ap_rdr&isDramIntegrated=true&shoppingPortalEnabled=true

·       Blog: http://writinginthedarktw.blogspot.com/

·       YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/timwaggonerswritinginthedark

·       Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/133838.Tim_Waggoner

·       Instagram: tim.waggoner.scribe

·       Threads: @tim.waggoner.scribe@threads.net

·       Bluesky: @timwaggoner.bsky.social

·       Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/tim.waggoner.9

·       Substack: @timwaggoner

Are Writers' Organizations Obsolete?

 

Are Writers’ Organizations Obsolete?

Before you start in on this entry, you might want to read my previous blog post about writers’ orgs – “Alone or Together: Are Writers’ Organizations for You?” https://writinginthedarktw.blogspot.com/2025/01/alone-or-together-are-writers.html

And while I talk about the Horror Writers Association in this post, this isn’t meant to be a condemnation of the entire org and everyone involved. There are a lot of good people in the org who want HWA to be the best it can be.

Okay, on to the entry…

During the tail end of the 80s, one of my most cherished writing goals was to make enough pro-level fiction sales to qualify for membership in both the Horror Writers Association and the Science Fiction Writers of America, as it was called then. (It’s now the Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers Association.) Pro-level meant that you sold three stories for 3 cents a word or a novel for…maybe a $2000 advance (I can’t recall the exact amount). Once you had enough qualifying sales, you had to provide documentation of them by physically photocopying acceptance letters and mailing them to the organizations. (No email yet.) My first pro-level sale was to an anthology called Young Blood, and I never received payment. As far as I know, none of the contributors did. I was afraid HWA and SFWA would somehow find out, and I wouldn’t get in, but they didn’t, and I was able to join as an affiliate member. This meant that I couldn’t vote in elections or for awards, but I had access to all the other resources the organization offered to members. I didn’t give a damn about voting. I wanted to advance my writing career, and affiliate membership was more than good enough for that purpose.

The biggest perk of membership was free access to the GEnie message boards, and specifically to HWA’s and SFWA’s private areas for members only. Genie was basically a huge message board with different topics. This was in the earliest days of the Internet (we used dial-up), and there were no websites yet. Being able to interact with pro writers on the boards and in private chats was incredible. Writers like Charles L. Grant, Rick Hautala, F. Paul Wilson, George R.R. Martin, Jerry Pournelle, Damon Knight, Judith Tarr, Joe Haldeman, Katherine Kerr, Tad Williams, J. Michael Straczynski, Nancy Collins, Lawrence Watt-Evans, Douglas Clegg, Ramsey Campbell, Stephen Mark Rainey, and many more trod the boards in those days. It was like a 24/7 bar con. I learned so much from Genie.

And then websites began to appear.

Writers left GEnie in droves and created their own websites with dedicated message boards for their fans. GEnie withered and died, as did SF/F/H topic areas on AOL, Delphi, and CompuServe. There were members-only message boards on SFWA’s and HWA’s websites, and that’s where SF/F/H writers hung out virtually until social media became a thing. Now writers have multiple social media accounts, YouTube channels, TikTok accounts, Patreon accounts, and email newsletters. How-to-write, marketing, and publishing info became easy to find on the Internet (although knowing whether you could trust that info was a different matter). Online commerce allowed small-press publishers to compete with the Big 5 (as well as publish cool, quirky books the Big 5 wouldn’t touch). Then self-publishing became a viable career path. Then AI showed up, but fuck AI. No self-respecting writer uses it.

Why the history lesson? Because the world has evolved beyond the need for writers’ organizations. What can they do that writers can’t do for themselves (at least in terms of networking and career education)? They can provide access to healthcare, and – if they’re large enough and powerful enough, such as the Authors Guild – advocate legally on behalf of members (as individuals or as a group). Writers orgs can put on writing conventions, but you don’t have to be a member to attend them.

If you’re a Horror writer, you probably know about the HWA’s recent troubles. If not, you can read about them here: https://file770.com/hwa-dissolves-excecutive-director-position-amid-series-of-controversies/

There were serious problems that people absolutely should’ve brought forward, and it’s a damn good thing they did.

I’ve been a member of HWA and SFWA for 30 years or so, and both have had their fair share of controversies and conflict over the decades. But for HWA, this time was different. It was a lot in a short time. Most of the reactions online were from people with legitimate concerns about the events and the organization in general. But people also aired unrelated grievances with HWA, and they used the events as “proof” that HWA (or that the overall concept of writers’ organizations) was useless at best or downright evil at worst. HWA listened and has begun the process of trying to right their ship and make substantial changes going forward. But it may be too little, too late. Many people quit the organization or decided not to renew their membership, and many decided to boycott StokerCon. I have no idea how much of a financial hit the organization might take from this, but it could be substantial and possibly fatal.

Many people called for the end of HWA, viewing it as irredeemable by this point (and perhaps it is in a public relations sense, if nothing else). Others suggested a major overhaul, stripping it down to just the programs it offers that writers can’t get elsewhere, such as StokerCon and the Bram Stoker Awards.

Brian Keene and Mary SanGiovanni recently discussed “5 Reasons Your 5 Reasons to Stay with HWA are Moot” on Keeneversations, but many of their points apply to writers’ orgs in general: https://open.spotify.com/episode/5QecF2y0xXYrs02y2VUWGG

People often join writers’ organizations at the beginning of their careers and then leave when they feel they’ve gotten what they need. In a sense, they “graduate” from the org. And orgs often struggle to serve the needs of established writers, since by that point in their careers, these writers have enough knowledge and experience to do without an org, relying on colleagues, editors, agents, etc.

So if you're considering joining – or leaving – a writers’ org, how do you judge it? By the services they offer to members.

The Authors Guild is widely accepted as one of the best organizations for writers, and I think the member services they offer are a good template for what an effective org should offer. Member benefits include (quoted from the Guild’s website):

• Legal Services: “Navigate the legal aspects of writing with the help of our experienced lawyers, including contract reviews, copyright questions, dispute intervention, and more.”
• Web Services: “Manage your online presence with our web services for members, including our exclusive website-building software.”
• Insurance and Discounts: “Get help with Marketplace coverage, find liability insurance, and save with discounted products and services to support you and your writing business.”
• Writers Community: “Meet fellow members and discuss the business of writing in our online forum.
• Regional Chapters: “Get involved and find the support of a local writing community in your area.”
• Educational Events: “Learn the business and legal side of writing with our recorded webinars and panels.”

If you want to check out the Authors Guild member benefits yourself: https://authorsguild.org/membership/

What on that list can’t you do for yourself (or do for yourself easily)?

• Legal Services. This is probably the most important benefit, and the one that is useful to writers at all stages of their careers. And the Guild advocates for writers as a group, and they have enough clout for their advocacy to have some muscle behind it.
• Insurance. If you don’t have insurance via your day job (like I do), you can obtain it through the Guild.
• Educational Events. Your mileage may vary on this one. You can find zillions of articles and videos about writing and publishing on the Internet, but you have to vet them and decide for yourself whether the authors know what the hell they’re talking about. The Authors Guild vouches for all of the resources they offer, so you’re guaranteed they’ll be of professional quality. You can also learn a lot from social media, provided you follow experienced writers, editors, and agents who know their shit.

Everything else on the Guild’s list of benefits, you could do for yourself. You can build your own website, create a community of writers and readers online, find or create a local writers’ group…

If you aren’t sure if a particular organization is for you, join one for a year or two, then quit and try out another. You could also pool money with friends, buy an organization membership in one of your names and then share the resources.

Cost is, of course, a big issue, and it’s important you feel you’re getting your money’s worth as a writer. After all, just because an org offers certain benefits doesn’t mean they do so effectively or consistently. Below are some orgs’ membership and conference fees for comparison.

NOTE: The conferences listed below all have cheaper early-bird registration links.

Authors Guild

Dues: $149 per year.

Horror Writers Association

HWA Dues: $94

StokerCon General Admission Fee: $300

The Bram Stoker Awards Banquet: $100

The Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers Association

SFWA Dues: $100 per year.

Nebula Awards Weekend: $275

International Thriller Writers Association

Dues: None.

Thrillerfest: $550 (but they have add-on programs for additional fees)

Thriller Awards Banquet: $273.

The Association of Writers and Writing Programs

Dues: $70 per year.

AWP Conference: $440.

So Where Do I Stand on Writers' Organizations?

One of the points I made in my previous blog post about writers’ orgs is that you need to actively take advantage of whatever services they offer. Many people in the last few weeks posted on social media that “HWA never did anything” for them. Whenever I read comments like this, I always wonder if the poster tried to avail themselves of any of the org’s services.

But if you belong to a writers’ org, you should ask yourself if you feel your membership has been and continues to be valuable to you and is worth the cost. No orgs are perfect, though. Mistakes happen, as does the bad behavior of individuals, but you need to decide when those mistakes become big enough and numerous enough that you no longer want to be associated with that org. (Or don’t want to join in the first place.)

I’m a member of HWA, SFWA, ITW (The International Association of Thriller Writers), and the IAMTW (the International Association of Media Tie-In Writers). I wouldn’t quit the ITW, mostly because there are no dues, and I occasionally use some of their promotional opportunities for members. I find the IAMTW valuable – members share experiences with various publishers, as well as submission calls – and its dues are minimal. I haven’t used the vast majority of SFWA’s services in decades. I do use some of HWA’s services (and I try to volunteer/help out when I can), but I love so many of the people involved with the org, and that’s the main reason I’ve remained a member. I’ve quit before, though, because I didn’t agree with the direction the org was going in at the time, but I eventually rejoined. I’m giving serious thought to not renewing my membership, though. Same with SFWA. For years, I’ve regarded my dues for SFWA and HWA as donations to those organizations. But I’ve “donated” for decades now. Maybe that’s long enough.

Do you need to be a member of a writers’ organization? No. If you become a member, will you see any benefits? Sure, if you actively take advantage of them. Will those benefits be worth your dues? That’s something you’d have to decide.

Logically, the Authors Guild is probably the best organization to belong to if you want to be part of one, especially if you’re a writer with an established career. I tried it out once and liked it, but I didn’t renew my membership (primarily because I decided I belonged to too many writers’ orgs back then). Maybe now I will renew, though.

Following are some links to resources you might find useful, whether you’re seeking to join a writers’ org for the first time or looking to switch to a new one.

Genre-Focused Writing Conferences Not Affiliated with a Writers’ Organization

AuthorCon: https://scaresthatcare.org/author-con

GenCon Writers’ Symposium: https://www.gencon.com/gen-con-indy/writers

List of Writers’ Organizations

The Association of Writers and Writing Programs: http://www.awpwriter.org/

The American Society for Journalists and Authors: http://www.asja.org/index9.php

The Authors Guild: http://www.authorsguild.org/

PEN America: https://pen.org/

The Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers of America: http://www.sfwa.org

The Horror Writers Association: http://www.horror.org

Women in Horror Arts & Media Association: https://www.socowomeninhorrorfestival.com/

The British Fantasy Society (You don’t have to be a Brit to join.): https://britishfantasysociety.org/

The Romance Writers of America: https://www.rwa.org/

The Society for Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators:

http://www.scbwi.org/

The Mystery Writers of America: http://www.mysterywriters.org/

The Western Writers of America: http://www.westernwriters.org/

The American Academy of Poets: http://www.poets.org/

The International Thriller Writers, Inc.: http://www.internationalthrillerwriters.com/

The International Association of Media Tie-In Writers: http://www.iamtw.org/

Association of Ghostwriters: https://associationofghostwriters.org/

Editorial Freelancers Association: https://www.the-efa.org/

The Alliance of Independent Authors: https://www.allianceindependentauthors.org/

National Writers Union: https://nwu.org/

DEPARTMENT OF SHAMELESS SELF-PROMOTION

My Super-Secret Novelization

My next novelization comes out in less than a month. It hasn’t been officially announced yet (for reasons), nor are there any preorder links. That should soon change, and I’ll announce it far and wide on social media when it does. I’ll also write a blog post about it.

New Audio Releases

A couple of my books have audio releases soon!

Writing in the Dark (read by David Stifel), out 9/29/26

The World Turns Red (read by Andrew Mitakides), 10/6/26

Both are available for preorder in the usual places!

SCHEDULED APPEARANCES

AuthorCon VII. March 5-7. Williamsburg, Virginia.

StokerCon. June 10-13. Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

WHERE TO FIND ME ONLINE

Want to follow me on social media? Here’s where you can find me:

Website: www.timwaggoner.com

Newsletter Sign-Up: https://timwaggoner.com/contact.htm

Amazon Page: https://www.amazon.com/stores/Tim-Waggoner/author/B001JP0XFM?ref=ap_rdr&store_ref=ap_rdr&isDramIntegrated=true&shoppingPortalEnabled=true

Blog: http://writinginthedarktw.blogspot.com/

YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/timwaggonerswritinginthedark

Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/133838.Tim_Waggoner

Instagram: tim.waggoner.scribe

Threads: @tim.waggoner.scribe@threads.net

Bluesky: @timwaggoner.bsky.social

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/tim.waggoner.9

Substack: @timwaggoner

Typos: the 21st Century Author’s Mark of Excellence by Alethea Kontis

 

Tim here. This time I have the honor and privilege of sharing a guest post with you from my dear friend, Alethea Kontis!

 

IG: https://www.instagram.com/aletheakontis/

Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/aletheakontis.com

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/Thieftess

 

THIEFTESS: https://aletheakontis.com/2026/06/thieftess/

 

Hello, everyone! Alethea Kontis here. I’m a NYT bestselling, award-winning author and all that—most importantly I have the honor of being Tim Waggoner’s friend. Tim is not only a wonderful man and an excellent writer, he is also a positively superb friend.

Like me, he doesn’t mind collecting misfits.

I’m a publishing industry misfit who snuck in the back door. I majored in Chemistry with a minor in Marine Science, while also working as the Assistant Manager of the local movie theater. I graduated college at 20 and got a second job at a Waldenbooks. I made my first NY publishing contacts that fall, when the bookstore manager invited me to attend a little SF con with her over Labor Day weekend. It was called Dragon Con.

I haven’t left the publishing industry since.

I took my first formal creative writing class at 23: Orson Scott Card’s Boot Camp, a week-long intensive held at UNCG. It was an utterly amazing experience. After a 2-day workshop, 18 of us had to write a short story in 24-hours. The rest of the week was spent critiquing those stories.

When my turn came, four people said that they got so caught up in the story that they forgot to critique it. FOUR. I took that as a huge compliment.

What I didn’t realize at the time was that it also meant my life as a published author would be riddled with typos.

Typos are the curse of authors who write engaging books. If the copy editors or proofreaders get too caught up in the story, they don’t notice the comma that should be a period, or that “diffuse” should actually be “defuse.”

I was a copy editor at Baen for over 20 years. My work was excellent BECAUSE I don’t love military SF. I didn’t want get caught up in that story. That wasn’t my job.

Traditional publishers have rounds of editors. There’s your main Editor, the one who acquired your book in the first place. After that, the book goes to multiple copyeditors. Somewhere in that round, the Advance Reading Copies are printed for blurbs and reviews. Then there are multiple proofreaders. Sometimes typos are even caught in layout. Some are never caught at all.

Those typos are a true Mark of Excellence.

My first Mark of Excellence appeared in my very first book: ALPHAOOPS! THE DAY Z WENT FIRST. An Iranian friend at work stopped my office one day to tell me that while reading the book with his daughter, they noticed that “accordion” was spelled “accordian.” He asked if we had done this on purpose because it was “on the A page.”

Ha! Nope.

Bless him for being so kind. Every single one of us had missed it, from the editor to the art director, after several years and countless passes of the book. ALPHAOOPS itself has less than 500 words total. But Hussein caught it, because English was not his first language.

I laughed when I called up Candlewick and said, “STOP THE PRESSES!” Because who gets to yell that in this day and age? We managed to catch it just before they started the book’s second print run. Every time I read that book out loud, I think of Hussein and smile.

My other Glaring Typo was in DEAREST, the third book in the Woodcutter Sisters series. Harcourt Books was acquired by Houghton Mifflin and then went through a huge reorganization. My series was dropped, and everyone I had worked with on my books left the company. Luckily, DEAREST was already finished. Or so we thought.

It wasn’t until several years later, when I was listening to Katy Kellgren’s fabulous performance of the audiobook, that I noticed Odette the swan was introduced at the royal ball as “Princess Odessa.”

I asked Katy about it the next time I saw her—she actually remembered that typo. She had wanted to fix it, but Audible forced her to match the print book.

Oh, how I wish someone would have called me. Now that I have the rights back to those books, I’ve been able to fix the typo in print. But sweet Katy is no longer with us, so the typo in the audiobook remains. My Mark of Excellence.

Tim has posted some wonderful essays on AI recently, and how saving drafts, emails, and track-changes versions can serve as proof of non-AI writing labor. In a way, typos also serve this purpose. I’ve seen more and more posts recently from readers who are reassured when they find a typo, because it serves as further proof that their favorite authors and publishers aren’t using AI in their process.

Typos also have a long history of being engagement bait—remember that time when funny text memes flooded the internet, but they always had a strange typo somewhere? These typos were 100% intentional. People can’t help but to leave a comment correcting these memes. As you know, comments are engagement that gets the post more views…and subsequently more comments, because nobody actually reads the previous comments before leaving one themselves. The loop goes on, and the post perpetuates.

Yeah…even though I know this tactic will force the algorithms to boost my post, I can’t bring myself to do it on purpose. When I see a typo, if it is within my power to fix it, I will fix it.

Which leads us to another Lost Art that I suspect may become popular again: the Collector’s Edition. Not the fancy-dancy book with the gilt cover and sprayed edges—I’m talking about the upside-down airplane stamp. The Boba Fett action figure with the closed fist. The imperfect printed version that serves as inexorable proof that YOU were one of the first serious people in the fandom.

But I don’t know…are enough people reading these days to make that a thing?

I mean, if vinyl can be a huge commodity in the collecting world, who’s to say that books with typos can’t too?

What do y’all think?

So Some Social Media Rando Thinks You Write with AI...

 

Creator: nicoletaionescu, Credit: Getty Images

 

Recently, I saw fellow horror author S. Alessandro Martinez post on Facebook that someone accused him of using generative AI to write because his work had perfect grammar.

Alessandro and I after the Bram Stoker Awards Banquet, 2026

 

(This is where you imagine me screaming Fuck! so long and loud that my house eventually collapses around me.) The Dark Lords save us from people on the Internet who think they know everything, when they really only know two things: jack and shit.

 

“Fuck off” is a perfectly reasonable response to these idiots, as is ignoring them (which is my preference; why give them the attention they crave?).

 

But what if editors and agents start asking us to prove we didn’t use AI to produce our writing?

 

I haven’t heard of anyone doing this yet, but it’s becoming common for agents and publishers to have writers sign “I did not use AI” statements in contracts. It’s not far-fetched to believe a day may come when the burden is on the writer to prove their work is 100% self-written.

 

Not long after my first daughter was born, I realized that if I were out in public with her and someone came up to me – another citizen, a cop, a federal agent – and demanded proof that I was my child’s father, I had nothing I could show them. No “parental license.” No wallet-sized duplicate birth certificate. There were no smartphones back then, so if I had any photos of the two of us together, they’d be small ones I could carry in my wallet. I’d have no video of the two of us together.

 

I feel a little like that when I consider how I would prove something I wrote really was something I wrote.

 

I plan to retire from my college teaching job in two years, and what I’d love to do (because of AI) is quiet quit, pretend AI doesn’t exist, and grade papers as if none are plagiarized until I can walk out the door with my full retirement package and never set foot inside a classroom again. But I guess I’m just too damn dedicated and conscientious. (Or too stupid and pigheaded.) So I asked my two summer semester classes how they could prove to an instructor that they wrote their work if asked. (I told them not to worry about using assistive AI, like various grammar and spellcheck programs.) Here are some of their lightly edited comments:

 

“One of the best ways I could prove that my memoir wasn’t written by AI is the notes that I took. Notes that recall personal, one-of-a-kind details that only I could confidently express since our own experiences are so unique.”

 

“I’m a real person with real feelings vs AI. It wouldn’t add any human emotions.”

 

“I have a certain writing style I seem to always write in, in comparison to AI’s style of writing papers.”

 

“A good way to prove that a paper was not written by AI is to take notes about your topic. The more notes you take on a topic, the better, so you can show your professor or teacher once you turn it in. I believe that the better notes taken on a topic, the easier your paper is going to be to write. Show your thought process and ideas that led to that specific topic.”

 

“I can provide any notes, outlines, drafts, brainstorming materials, or document revision history that may help demonstrate how the essay was developed.”

 

“How can I prove my essay was not written by AI?

·        I can document the writing process

·        Show the work history of my document

·        Have others proofread it for me

·        Document the editing process

·        Document any research that goes into the writing process”

 

I wasn’t surprised by these comments. They mostly boil down to “Turn in my invention materials, my drafts, and my feedback along with my final” – which they’re supposed to do anyway. What does this mean for working authors, though? You might have to treat your job a little like you’re in a composition class. The difference is that you would document your process in case someone asks to see it. This might mean extra work for you, and work that will seem useless if no agents or publishers ask for it. But it might become the standard way writers do business sooner rather than later.

 

For a time, I used to handwrite my drafts, so I would have those pages to show editors, but I haven’t done that for a few years now. I have outlines and notes regarding the characters, settings, names of things, etc., on my computer. Maybe those files are timestamped, but I have no idea if they are or how to find out. And I don’t leave track changes on when I write. Hell, I can barely figure out how to use track changes when an editor sends me manuscript feedback. So if an agent or editor asked me for proof that I wrote something, I wouldn’t have much.

 

In the old days—back when Fred, Barney, and I were in a writers’ group in Bedrock – common wisdom was that to prove you wrote a manuscript, you needed only mail it to yourself and then store it in a safe-deposit box. The date stamp on the envelope, along with no evidence of tampering, was supposed to be all the proof you needed. This won’t work in the age of AI, though. Even if you pay to officially register your copyright, the manuscript you submit could’ve been written by AI before you applied for copyright. There is a way you can do a modern equivalent of mailing yourself a copy of your work, though.

 

Get a new email address, and when you finish the day’s writing, send it to that address. You’ll have the file in the outgoing email of your main address, and the file will be in the inbox of your other address. I’m sure there are ways to falsify the day and time you sent an email, but most people don’t know how to do this. And yes, you could be sending small sections of an AI manuscript to yourself day after day to fake evidence of a writing process over months and years, but I doubt anyone who would use AI could make themselves wait so long to “finish” their novel. Process means nothing to them, because if it did, they’d write their own material and never go near AI.

 

If you get feedback from beta readers, make sure it’s dated, save it, and have it ready to show editors and agents if necessary. Having a folder on your computer for each project where you put all the process work will save you from having to send tons of attachments to agents and editors.

 

My college subscribes to Turnitin, a plagiarism detection program/service that’s only available to educational institutions, but there are alternatives you can use to generate a report that you could show to editors and agents. Here’s a link to an article on such alternatives that individuals can use:

 

“The Top 5 Turnitin Alternatives (2026)” https://gptzero.me/news/top-turnitin-alternatives/

 

I know, ChatGPT’s company wrote the article, but the comparison between the alternatives looks decent.

 

The following article provides specific steps you can take if you’re accused of using generative AI to produce your work. It’s written for students, so you’d need to adapt some of the steps for your situation.

 

 “How to Prove Your Essay Wasn’t Written by AI: Seven Steps to Prove Authorship.” https://racinecountyeye.com/2023/08/23/to-prove-essay-wasnt-written-by-ai/

 

I’m lucky. I’ve been writing and publishing for over forty years. I’ve got a long record of publication that I can put forward to show my current writing style, which – while hopefully improved – still holds similarities in style, content, language, and theme to my older work. Any writer who has published work before the advent of AI has this advantage. Some rando accuses you of using AI? Send them a link to your website, your Amazon author page, your bibliography on Fantastic Fiction, your Goodreads author page, or your Wikipedia entry. Or, if, like me, you have all of these, send them ALL the goddamned links!

 

Wikipedia has a long entry on how to spot AI-written text, as well as a quiz on how to test your AI-spotting ability. Since AI-written material is average at best, you could use the list to improve your own writing and avoid any unintentional similarities with AI slop. I think there’s a potential danger for writers here, though, because you might go nuts trying to make your writing “perfect” and end up so paralyzed that you never produce anything. Although editors and agents might find the examples in the entry handy to help them spot AI slop.

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Signs_of_AI_writing

 

What bothers me the most about the entry is this passage:

 

“One has to be aware that human speech and writing is being influenced by LLMs, and thus they are becoming more similar. This was already evident in 2024, as shown by a study that detected a significant LLM influence in spoken content (e.g. conversational podcasts). Further studies seem to confirm this influence on language, including semantics and word choices.”

 

(We are sooooooo fucked…)

 

I wrote a recent blog post discussing writing techniques that you can use that will set your work apart from AI (and hopefully save you the hassle of having to prove your work truly is your work). You can find the entry here: https://writinginthedarktw.blogspot.com/2026/04/how-to-win-war-against-ai-fiction.html

 

I think the most important thing writers can do during this time of AI upheaval is to preserve their sanity and their ability to continue creating their work. So do whatever you need to in order to stay mentally healthy and function creatively. If that means pretending you live in a world without AI, so be it. If you want to prepare yourself for potential questions about whether your work is AI, do that. But whatever you do, keep writing. The only way we’ll be able to counter AI slop is by continuing to produce good writing that only we can create.

 

Fuck AI.

 

DEPARTMENT OF SHAMELESS SELF-PROMOTION

 

My story “When the Mask Comes Off” appears in the Creepshow anthology edited by James Aquillone. (Officially released on June 23^rd.) Amazon: https://tinyurl.com/45jf33zw

 

“The World Has Teeth” appears in Of Dread, Decay, and Doom, edited by Jendia Gammon, Gareth L. Powell, and Scarlett R. Algee. Amazon: https://tinyurl.com/2wzam2dd

 

“Closure” appears in Darkness at the End of the Road: The Winding Road Stories Horror Anthology, edited by Alexander Nader. Amazon: https://tinyurl.com/5aj2pnau

 

SCHEDULED APPEARANCES

 

Shore Leave 46. July 10-12. Lancaster Wyndham Resort and Convention Center, Lancaster, Pennsylvania.

 

Gen Con Writers Symposium. July 29-August 2. Indianapolis, Indiana.

 

Into the Springs Writers Workshop. August 7-9. Yellow Springs, Ohio.

 

Shivercon. August 14-15. Muncie, Indiana.

 

WHERE TO FIND ME ONLINE

 

Want to follow me on social media? Here’s where you can find me:

 

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