I’m writing this at 6:23 pm on Christmas Day. My family has always celebrated the holiday on Christmas Eve (my dad said this was so the kids would sleep and not keep their parents up all night), so my Christmas was on the 24th. My one-year-old dachshund Bailey is snoozing on the couch next to me, and my fifteen-year-old cat Banshee is sleeping on the other couch. My wife is in the bedroom, talking to her aunt on the phone.
The
holiday season can be rough on people. There’s pressure to buy a lot of shit,
pressure to interact with family members you might not get along with, pressure
to entertain guests, pressure to be happy and love everything and everyone. And
if you normally feel down, you might feel even more down. Holidays magnify everything,
good and bad. But for writers, the end of the year can be hard for other
reasons as well. For this is the time when writers taut their accomplishments
for the year on social media, and it’s the time readers, reviewers, and
critics post their best-of-the-year booklists. And it doesn’t help that the
publishing business grinds to a halt in December, so there’s a whole lot of
nothing happening for traditionally published writers this month. (My agent
won’t submit anything in December because of this. She waits and starts
submitting again in January.)
Sometimes
I wonder if we should come up with a name for this season. The December
Doldrums? The Great Suck? The Envytime? Whether it has a name or not, it’s a
lousy headspace to be in, especially with all the other stresses the holiday
season can bring. But if you intend to remain a writer, you’re going to have to
find a way to get through this time and come out the other side, if not
recharged, then at least prepared to keep plugging away.
I
struggle with posting my writing accomplishments at the end of the year. On the
one hand, it gives me something to put on social media and it might help
promote me and my work. But on the other hand, it could demoralize newer
authors, authors who write slower than I do, or authors who have more obstacles
in their lives than I do that keep them from writing as often or as much as
they want. But this year I decided to do it and see what sort of reaction I
got. Here’s what I posted across my various social media account – Facebook,
Instagram, Bluesky, and Threads. (I still have an account on X/Twitter, but
only so someone else can’t claim my name there and pretend to be me. I don’t
post on X/Twitter anymore because fuck nazis, terfs, racists, homophobes, transphobes,
and maga-heads.)
Here’s
my 2023 Writing Year in Review!
I
wrote:
1
novelization
1.5
novels
1
novella
6
short stories
(And a couple more stories that haven’t sold
yet)
2
introductions
3
articles for the HWA Newsletter
I
won my fourth Bram Stoker Award and my first Scribe Award.
I
conducted 10 writing workshops.
After
posting, I added this:
I
forgot articles for 16 blog entries and articles for 7 newsletters (usually 2 articles
per newsletter)!
And
I totally forgot to mention the handful of videos I recorded for my YouTube
channel.
Does
this sound like a lot? It’s more or less a normal amount of productivity for me,
and has been since my daughters hit high school. They’re 23 and 28 now and
haven’t lived at home for a while, but when they were very young, I was lucky
to produce a third of what’s on the list, if that. I started writing at 18 and
I’m 59 now, so I’ve had a lot of practice, which naturally helps me be
more productive. And I’ve always been a fast writer, which obviously helps too.
I’m also lucky that my long career means that people often approach me about
doing projects. My novelization, novella, most of the short stories, the
introductions, and all the workshops on the list came about because someone
reached out to me and asked, “Hey, would you be interested in doing something
for us?” It’s a lot easier to be productive (at least it is for me) when you
know someone already wants what you’re creating.
The
responses I got to my year-end productivity post were positive, and thankfully
I didn’t get responses from people using my post to beat up on themselves. You’re
so lucky. I wish someone would ask me to contribute a story to an
anthology. I’m sure there were people who read the post and thought
something like that, though. The reason I know this is because I sometimes
think things like that when I read other authors’ year-end posts. You might
think with everything I’ve accomplished so far in my career, I wouldn’t compare
my achievements to anyone else’s, but you’ d be wrong. I don’t get
super-depressed when other writers post their accomplishments, but I can feel
wistful, jealous, and negative about myself as a writer.
I
don’t mean this post to read like a Festivus airing of grievances. I’m writing
it to let you know that even writers that have had a certain amount of success
can still feel down during the Great Suck.
Here’s what always
makes me envious about other authors’ end-of-the-year lists and posts.
·
They worked with publishers I want to work with. Most of my writing
has been traditionally published with small to medium-press companies. I’ve had
some media tie-in books published with bigger houses, but not my original work.
And some of these bigger publishers have had submissions of original fiction of
mine for several years without responding.
·
They made foreign rights sales. My media tie-in
books have been translated into other languages, but aside from a French
edition of Nekropolis and a few short stories, I’ve had no luck selling
my fiction to foreign publishers – and I’ve tried for decades. An Italian
publisher was going to bring out an edition of Like Death, but they
folded before it was published. I’ve submitted work to a number of foreign
publishers over the years, but after initial contact they always ghost me. So
when I see writers talk about their foreign rights sales at the end of the
year, I’m always envious (and I wonder what’s wrong with my work that foreign
publishers of horror fiction don’t want to take it).
·
They made movie or TV deals. I’ve come close a
few times over the years. When Like Death first came out, a producer of
soft-core porn wanted to option it. He sent me a DVD of one of his films. I
barely made it through the first few minutes, so that was a no from me, dawg.
The screenwriter of Halloween 6 was interested in Like Death as
well, but that movie isn’t good (to put it mildly), so I passed. When Nekropolis
came out, several screenwriters and producers were interested in it, but none of
them offered any money. My agent at the time said, “No money, no option,” and I
followed his advice. That’s common wisdom in the writing world, but I sometimes
wonder what might’ve happened if I took a chance on some of these people. It’s
been years since any film folk have inquired about rights to any of my work,
and although I reach out to some from time to time, nothing has come of it. So
seeing writers talk about the works they had optioned over the previous year always
makes me let out a big sigh.
·
Their work appears on best-of-the-year lists. My work rarely
appears on any of these lists. (Writing in the Dark was an exception the
year it came out.) I read the lists, and I’m happy for my friends who made them,
but I’m always a bit wistful that I’m not listed with them.
·
Their stories appear in best-of anthologies. I’ve had stories
selected for editions of Best Hardcore Horror of the Year, but that series
was discontinued. I’ve had work in some other Best-of’s, such as The Best of
Cemetery Dance 2, but my work has never appeared in Ellen Datlow’s, Stephen
Jones’, or Paula Guran’s Best-of anthologies.
·
Their announce that this is their X anniversary as a
full-time writer. This
one always strikes me as funny because I long ago decided not to try to become
a full-time writer. Back in the 90’s, I was on an online message board called GEnie,
and since message boards were new (and few and far between), a lot of
professional writers were there, too. In private topics reserved for members of
writers’ organizations, writers would discuss what it was like for them to
write full time: no health insurance, unstable and unreliable income, trouble
paying bills, trouble feeding themselves and their family, etc. The ones who
were doing okay usually had spouses that provided the benefits and a majority
of the income. Sure, there were writers who made a living solely off their work
with no extra sources of income, but they weren’t common. The writers who
struggled to make ends meet were so stressed that they had difficulty producing
work as well. All of that sounded like a nightmare to me, plus I wanted to stay
connected to the world so I would have new experiences to fuel my writing. This
is why I started teaching college-level writing classes, and why I’ve kept on
doing it for over 35 years. And yet, whenever I see another writer post that
this is the tenth anniversary of their full-time career as a novelist, I still wonder
if I made the right choice.
·
They went to more conventions/writing events than I did.
I
get so jealous when I see other writers list all the cons and events they’ve
gone to – especially the ones where lots of writers are present. One of the
hard things about being a writer is that my friends are scattered across the world,
and I mostly interact with them online. I rarely get to hang out with them in
person, and I wish I was able to travel more frequently.
·
The Ghosts of Envies Past: I used to get
down when writers posted about the awards they’d won, until I started winning
some myself. And I used to get down about writers who published more often and
more regularly than I did until I started publishing a fair amount each year.
So how can you deal with the
end-of-the-year writer blahs? Here are some things I do.
· I allow myself to
feel my feelings, but I try not to intensify them. If a small fire
starts, it will burn out on its own before too long. But if you keep pouring
gasoline on it, it’ll grow and spread. Focusing on negative feelings can
intensify them until they become entrenched, then they’re much harder to get
rid of. I let the feelings come, I feel them, then I let them go (or at least I’ll
try).
·
Focus on what you have, not what you don’t have. It’s human nature
to desire what we don’t have and to feel shitty if we don’t get it. You can
make an argument that this feeling of lack is what drives us to achieve more,
but if we never take the time to appreciate our achievements, whatever they
are, lack is all we’ll ever feel. We’ll feel like we’re never good enough and
never will be, and that’s a miserable state to exist in. And, of course, our
writing will suffer for it. I try to celebrate every writing victory, however
small, even if the celebration is something like buying a new book to read or going
out to eat (at a reasonably priced restaurant). Years ago, I used to keep a
daily writing journal where I’d record how much I’d written each day, any writing
business-related stuff I did, and any achievements. I could look over entries whenever
I was feeling down, and doing so helped raise my spirits. If you don’t want to
bother with a journal, get a calendar, record achievements on the day they
happen, then when you need to, flip to past months, look at the entries, and remind
yourself that yes, you have made strides in your writing career.
·
Perseverance furthers. A lot of writers used to pass around this advice, but not so much these
days. It comes from the I Ching, which is used as in divination. If you’re
not familiar with it, here’s a link for more info: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_Ching.
In 1985-86, I was the editor of my college literary magazine. My co-editor,
Vance Wissinger, was ten years older than me, and he introduced me to the I
Ching. Vance had me concentrate on a question – I chose Will I ever be a
professional writer? – then tossed a few Chinese coins that Vance brought
on top of a desk. He read the numbers on the coins, did some mental calculation,
then looked up the corresponding entry in the book for the answer to my question.
It was Perseverance furthers. (I wouldn’t be surprised if every page of
the I Ching has this answer on it, so often does it come up.) I didn’t
really believe it was a magical prediction, but the message still spoke to me. Perseverance
was something I could control, and furthers, while not promising massive
amounts of success, did promise progress. This phrase has been my mantra
whenever I start feeling crappy about my writing career. Perseverance
furthers.
·
Keep a Zen mindset. I’ve written about this before in previous
blog entries, but it bears repeating here. The author Taylor Grant says he
writes with intention but without attachment to a specific outcome. This means
he focuses on the creation of a piece of writing, making it the best it can be,
and doesn’t focus on what will happen to this piece of writing once it is finished.
Once the writing is complete, he’s succeeded in his goal. Whatever happens with
the piece afterward is icing on the cake. To put this technique into practice
regarding the topic for this entry, let’s say you write a ghost story with the
intention of making it a unique take on the trope while also being hella scary.
Once it’s finished to your satisfaction, you can submit it to an editor, but
you aren’t attached to it being published, or if it is published, you’re not
attached to it showing up on a Year’s-Best list (or being nominated for awards
or optioned for film, etc.). This mindset keeps you focused on the writing,
which is where your focus should be, and you don’t become overly focused on how
your writing is viewed by the world. I’ve found this mindset very helpful over
the years, especially if I find myself starting to feel disappointed my writing
didn’t achieve a specific goal, like being made into a zillion-dollar-grossing
blockbuster film.
·
What would the you of yesterday think of your writing career
today? I
sometimes think back to the eighteen-year-old I used to be and ask myself what
would he think of what his fifty-nine-year-old self has achieved in the last forty-one
years. Would he be glad to have the kind of career I’ve made for myself? Would
he feel like I was a success? If I went back in time and handed him a giant
stack of books I’ve written, would he give a shit that most of them never
appeared on a year’s-end best-of list? Of course, not (although he’d probably
be freaked out to see me!). The books would mean everything to him, though. Imagining
this helps me keep perspective on my achievements and career.
·
Why are you writing and who are you writing for? Are you writing to
be acknowledged in best-of lists, to win awards, make a pile of money, and to
get on Hollywood’s radar? Most of those things won’t happen for each book you
write, if they ever do happen. But if you write to please yourself, to learn
and grow as an artist, to entertain, challenge, provoke, or inspire your
readers, the lack of those other things won’t get you down. And paradoxically,
not worrying about them will result in better writing, which will give you a
better chance to win awards and get on Best-of lists.
· Control what you
can control – your writing. We can’t control how the world responds
(or doesn’t respond) to our work. What we can control is the writing
itself, and that’s why it should always be our main focus. Awards and appearances
on best-of-the-year lists are nice, but they are not the writing. Only the writing
is the writing.
It’s taken me a couple days to write this entry
since I’m also currently working on a novel that’s due soon. It’s the 26th
now. My wife is off shopping at Sam’s Club, Bailey is snoozing with her head in
my lap as I type, and Banshee is asleep on the same couch as yesterday, although
she’s moved to the other side of it. Variety is the spice of life, after all.
And in the interval between starting this entry and finishing it, I’ve seen
even more writers post their end-of-year reports on social media. One was a
writer who asked me to blurb his first book years ago, and he’s now an author
of 15 popular and well-regarded fantasy novels with more under contract, and he
recently quit his day job to become a full-time novelist, supporting his family
with his writing. So I had a chance to practice what I’ve preached above once
again!
Bailey checking to make sure Banshee is still alive
Try the techniques I’ve discussed whenever
you start feeling negative about your writing career, especially at the end of
the year. That, or stay off social media during the entire month of December.
Maybe January, too, just to be safe.
DEPARTMENT
OF SHAMELESS SELF-PROMOTION
Terrifier
2 Novelization
Bloody
Disgusting is launching their own publishing imprint, and they’re starting with
a novelization of Terrifier 2, written by me! Here’s a link to the
official announcement in Variety: https://variety.com/2023/biz/news/bloody-disgusting-terrifier-dead-space-1235791885/
The
good people are Bloody Disgusting are planning to have the book out in
February, but I don’t have any preorder links to share yet. No cover to share either.
Hopefully soon for both! I had an absolute blast writing the book, and I got to
add a number of original scenes. The plan is for me to also write novelizations
of Terrifier and Terrifier 3, but there are no contracts in place
yet. I’m confident the deal will work out, though.
The
Atrocity Engine
The
Atrocity Engine,
the first volume in my new series for Aethon Books, will be out April 30th,
2024, and it’s currently available to preorder. Here’s the publisher’s
description:
Men
in Black
meets Hellraiser in this rollicking mash-up of urban fantasy and cosmic
horror from four-time Bram Stoker Award-Winning author Tim Waggoner.
Creatures
from dark dimensions infesting your home? Demonic beings trying to drive you
insane? Alien gods attempting to destroy your universe?
Just
call Maintenance.
This
underpaid and overworked secret organization is dedicated to battling forces
that seek to speed up Entropy and hasten the Omniverse’s inevitable death.
Neal
Hudson is a twenty-year veteran of Maintenance. A surveyor who drives through
the streets of Ash Creek, Ohio constantly scanning for the deadly energy known
as Corruption. Since the death of his previous partner, Neal prefers to work
alone, and he’s not happy when he’s assigned to mentor a rookie.
But
they better learn to get along fast.
The
Multitude, a group of godlike beings who seek to increase Entropy at every
opportunity, are creating an Atrocity Engine. This foul magical device can
destroy the Earth, and they don’t care how many innocent lives it takes to
build it. (Spoiler alert: It’s a lot!)
Just
another day on the job. . .
Order
links:
Amazon
Hardback:
https://www.amazon.com/Atrocity-Engine-Tim-Waggoner/dp/1949890899/ref=tmm_hrd_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1699124447&sr=1-2
B&N
Hardcover:
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/book/1144299910?ean=9781949890891
Covers
for Book of Madness and The Desolation War
The
next two books in the series – Book of Madness and The Desolation War
– aren’t available for preorder yet, but I’m going to show you the covers. I
think they look awesome!
Let
Me Tell You a Story
In Let Me Tell You a Story, I
present stories from my own publishing career and use them to illustrate
writing techniques and discuss ways writers can improve their own work. It’s a
how-to book, but it’s also a career-retrospective short story collection, and a
memoir as well.
You
can order Let Me Tell You a Story directly from Raw Dog Screaming Press
here:
https://rawdogscreaming.com/books/let-me-tell-you-a-story/
But if you’d prefer to order from
Amazon or B&N . . .
Barnes and Noble Paperback: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/books/1143990468?ean=9781947879645
Barnes and Noble Hardback: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/books/1143990468?ean=9781947879638
Scheduled Appearances
StokerCon 2024. May 30th to
June 2nd. San Diego, California.
Where to Find Me Online
- Newsletter Sign-Up: https://timwaggoner.com/contact.htm
- Website: www.timwaggoner.com
- Link Tree: https://linktr.ee/twaggon1?subscribe
- Amazon Page: https://www.amazon.com/stores/Tim-Waggoner/author/B001JP0XFM?ref=ap_rdr&store_ref=ap_rdr&isDramIntegrated=true&shoppingPortalEnabled=true
- Blog: http://writinginthedarktw.blogspot.com/
- YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/timwaggonerswritinginthedark
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/tim.waggoner.9
- Instagram: tim.waggoner.scribe
- Threads: @tim.waggoner.scribe@threads.net
- BlueSky: @timwaggoner.bsky.social
- Slasher: @TimWaggoner